Fable of a hurting soul.

“Tell me your fable….A fable... Tell me your fable... Talk to me, tenderly …. Show reality fantasy, We'll bound together All win in one feat Talk to me, tenderly S

how reality fantasy, We'll bound together All win in one feat.”
- Robert Milles.

Every place has a story attached to it. A story which can be interpreted in any which way you attach yourself to it. It could be a happy story or a sad story. It can be a story that reminds you of your past memories or a story that makes you want to erase your memory.

This place where I stand right now, Xavier’s Villa, has a story attached to it. A story of a hunted hut, a story of a lady who wants to be attached to this place even after she is dead. In front of me are two graves, graves that hide things that makes me wonder, when I lie in one of them, what story would be attached to my name?

Right now I feel deserted and alone. Right now I feel like setting so many things back in place. Yet I know I can’t do that. And thus, I wonder, if I will ever be able to settle these demons in my own mind. Will my story finish with the same reluctance that I carry right now or will I be able to smile on it?

So many people have tried to change what their life has gone through, and I am just one of them. Every second is a struggle to come to terms with reality. A struggle which at times leaves us on the brink of self destruction. Moments when you fell as if your life has no meaning, no purpose. Moments when you fell it’s better to live alone than to lose someone you love and live with the pain for ever.

At such moment most of us would see fault in the best of things that we do. Even the greatest of achievements would look like drab. And the worst part is at such times you start losing interest in things that you are best in. Times that are yours to shine become grey and dark. You doubt the very thing that once you could have done with your eyes closed.
Xavier’s Villa! Oh what stories you hold? What past you must have had and what future beckons you? Oh my life! What would I do to go in my past? To a time when I could smile because I could see others smile. To a time when my pains were mere emotional feathers. Light and easy to blow away. Not like now. Not like today, when I can’t carry the burden of pricking soul with me anymore.

This house, in ruins it stands. Is this a reflection of where I have reached in my life? To make any decision, I struggle. And when I do decide on something, I do that for the wrong reasons. I stay alone, away from the ones I need. Or away because I feel they don’t want me? Demons of my own mind? Haunted like Xavier’s Villa?

I question myself over and over. I lose my sleep for that. I see myself drown in alcohol, and rise only after substance abuse. Was this my identity? Was this my final introduction? Who am I today and what will I be tomorrow? So many questions, yet the inability to answer them.
But, the fable must continue. It must reach its end. To a conclusion which even I don’t know of. Only thing I know is I have lost the story that I wanted to tell. Now, its just pieces of tales attached together to make MY FABLE!!!